September 16 and 17, 2023

Parshas VaYerah

Had a pretty good Rosh Hashana. Friday night’s meal was with Serka, myself and Sholem. Shabbaos, Rosh Hashanah morning go up at 7:00 AM, read the Mizrachi magazine doing a retrospective on the 50th year anniversary of the Yom Kippur war Davening was called for 8:45 AM and I got there at 9:15 AM, still at the beginning of Pesukei D’Zimra. Beautiful davening. Ari Grebel davened Shacharis and Avrohom Morgenstern davened Musaf. I learned little during the davening, rather focusing on the davening itself. Very inspirational.

For the Shabbos meal, we had Rivkie, Mordy, and their three kids, Eli and Xi, Sholem, Hudi and Atara Greenbaum. Atara is Dr. Laura and Avi Greeenbaum’s kid, granddaughter of Zlat and David Gross.

Saturday night was just Serka and myself.

Sunday morning was a carbon copy of the day before except for Shofar blowing by Ben Adlar. However, during Musaf I was putting together some Torah that occurred to me. Sunday lunch, Serka, myself, and Sholem walked to Rivkie and Mordy’s house for the Rosh Hashanah meal.

My Torah for Rosh Hashanah 2023

The Torah Leining for Rosh Hashanah Day 1 is from Genesis Chapter 21 covering the story God remembering Sara, giving birth, Yitzchok’s circumcision, Sara kicking out Hagar and Yismael, God saving them, and lastly the story of Avimelech the king of the Pelishtim approaching Avrohom to make a peace treaty. The Leining of Day 2 is Chapter 22 which is the next Chapter in the Chumosh. It is the story of the Akidah, which ends with Avrohom being told that his brother Nachar had a granddaughter Rivka.

I listened to the last Verse in the story of Sarah kicking out Hagar and Yismael, Pasuk 21:21 – וַיֵּ֖שֶׁב בְּמִדְבַּ֣ר פָּארָ֑ן וַתִּֽקַּֽח־ל֥וֹ אִמּ֛וֹ אִשָּׁ֖ה מֵאֶ֥רֶץ מִצְרָֽיִם. It struck me as odd. Why is Yishmael’s mother finding him a wife? He is 27 and can find a wife for himself. I thought about this Pasuk some more and asked what is this Pasuk telling us? Is it just a concluding Pasuk to let us know what happened after Yismael was saved? Similar to “and they lived happily ever after”. Rashi focused on Yishmael’s wife being from Egypt says:

מארץ מצרים. מִמְּקוֹם גִּדּוּלֶיהָ, שֶׁנֶּאֱמַר וְלָהּ שִׁפְחָה מִצְרִית וְגוֹ’ (בראשית ט״ז:א׳), הַיְנוּ דְּאָמְרִי אִינָשֵׁי זְרֹק חוּטְרָא לַאֲוִירָא, אֲעִיקְּרֵיהּ קָאֵי:
This Rashi raises a major question. If a person always goes back home, to its source, why didn’t Hagar go back to Egypt and settle there? Why did she and Yishmael live in the desert of Paran? Clearly she went back to Egypt to find a wife for his son.

Insights and issues:
A – It is amazing that Yishmael at age 27 follows the advice of his mother.
B – She did go back to Egypt to find a wife for his son, however, did not stay there. She stayed in the
desert of Paran and did not go back to Egypt.
C – What is this Pasuk telling us?

To understand this Pasuk we have to bring in a number of other Pesukim and Midrashim.

Number #1:
What did happen to Hagar? In Bereshis Pasuk 25:1 it says וַיֹּ֧סֶף אַבְרָהָ֛ם וַיִּקַּ֥ח אִשָּׁ֖ה וּשְׁמָ֥הּ קְטוּרָֽה׃.
Rashi says that Keturah is Hagar and she is called Keturah for two reasons – קטורה. זוֹ הָגָר, וְנִקְרֵאת קְטוּרָה עַל שֶׁנָּאִים מַעֲשֶׁיהָ כִּקְטֹרֶת (בראשית רבה), וְשֶׁקָּשְׁרָה פִּתְחָהּ, שֶֶׁלֹא נִזְדַּוְּגָה לְאָדָם מִיּוֹם שֶׁפֵּרְשָׁה מֵאַבְרָהָם:
She was a good person and performed good deeds. Put in other words, she lived an Abrahamic life, perhaps even setting up an Eshel to provide meals for travelers. She did not marry anyone else from when she left Avrohom. I would expand Rashi and say that she hoped one day to reunite with Avrohom as a wife. This is despite the rejection she must have felt twice. She was actually one her way back to Egypt after both times, and at least at the second time started to worship idols. Both times she saw the hand of God, God saved her and Yishmael, and made Yishmael into a great nation. She decided not to go back to Egypt because she was part of the Abrahamic peoplehood and did not want to marry anyone else and stay “loyal to Avrohom” which paid of at the end, when she remarried Avrohom.

Who brought Hagar back to marry Avrohom? Pasuk 24:62 וְיִצְחָק֙ בָּ֣א מִבּ֔וֹא בְּאֵ֥ר לַחַ֖י רֹאִ֑י וְה֥וּא יוֹשֵׁ֖ב בְּאֶ֥רֶץ הַנֶּֽגֶב׃. Rashi explains (מבוא באר לחי רואי. שֶׁהָלַךְ לְהָבִיא הָגָר לְאַבְרָהָם אָבִיו שֶׁיִּשָּׂאֶנָּה (בראשית רבה.
It was Yitzchok and per Rabbi Jonathan Sacks, Yitzchok wanted to reunite the family and bring not only Hagar back but also Yishmael, hopefully he would do Tshuva. Yishmael did do Tshuva as the Torah testifies to this twice, once when Avrohom died and the second time when Yisnael himself died.

Number #2:
Yonasan ben Uziel brings down the Perkei D’Rabbi Eliezer that Yismael was married twice. וְיָתִיב בְּמַדְבְּרָא דְפָּארָן וּנְסֵיב אִתְּתָא יַת עֲדִישָׁא וְתֵרְכָהּ וּנְסִיבַת לֵיהּ אִמֵיהּ יַת פְּטִימָא אִתְּתָא מֵאַרְעָא דְמִצְרָיִם
And he dwelt in the wilderness of Pharan, and took for a wife Adisha, but put her away. And his mother took for him Phatima to wife, from the land of Mizraim.

The Perkie D’Rav Eliezer is more expansive and tells us that Avrohom went to visit Yishmael three years later and a second time 3 years later. Avrohom left a coded message to Yishmael that his first wife was not good. Yishmael understood the message, divorced his wife, and remarried Phatima, the wife his mother found for him in Egypt. The Chizkuni confirms that the Pasuk’s statement that Hagar took a wife for Yishmael was the second wife.

It appears that despite Yishmael following evil ways, there was some goodness to him. He listened to his mother and felt the love of his father (וידע ישמעאל שעד עכשו רחמי אביו עליו כרחם אב על בנים) . Yishmael had a strong support system. His mother was a good person and she selected a good wife for him. There was a core of goodness in Yismael held that would later lead to his Tshuva and becoming a Tzaddik.

Pasuk 21:21 is telling us that Hagar lived in the desert of Paran and did not go back to live in Egypt, her birthplace. This is because she no longer lived the life of an idol worshiping Egyptian. She was a moral person, believing in Avrohom’s God, and a kind and generous person. She only went back to Egypt to tap her family network, and find a good wife for her son.

Sources:

Perkei D’Rav Eliezer – Chapter 30:
Chzikuni

Perkei D’Rav Eliezer – Chapter 30:

הנסיון התשיעי, נולד ישמעאל בקשת ונתרבה בקשת שנ’ ויהי אלהים את הנער ויגדל ונטל קשת וחצים והיה יורה אחר הפנות וראה את יצחק יושב לבדו וירה חץ להרגו וראה זה הדבר שרה והגיד לאברהם ואמרה לו כזה וכזה עשה ישמעאל ליצחק אלא עמוד וכתוב ליצחק כל מה שנשבע הב”ה לך ולזרעך שאין בן האמה יורש עם בני עם יצחק שנ’ ותאמר לאברהם גרש את האמה הזאת ואת בנה כי לא יירש בן האמה הזאת עם בני עם יצחק.
יהודה בן תימא אומר, אמרה שרה לאברהם כתוב גט גרושין לאמה ושלח את האמה הזאת מעלי ומעל יצחק בני מן העולם הזה ומן העולם הבא. ומכל הרעות שבאו על אברהם הרע בעיניו הדבר הזה מאד, שנאמר (בראשית כא, יא) וַיֵּרַע הַדָּבָר מְאֹד בְּעֵינֵי אַבְרָהָם עַל אוֹדֹת בְּנוֹ.
ר’ יהודה אומר, נגלה הב”ה עליו אמ’ לו אברהם אין אתה יודע שהיתה שרה ראויה לך לאשה ממעי אמה והיא חברתך ואשת בריתך לא נקראת שרה שפחה אלא אשתך לא נקראת הגר אשתך אלא שפחתך כל מה שדברה שרה באמת הגידה אל ירע בעיניך.
השכים אברהם וכתב גט גירושין ונתן להגר ושלח אותה ואת בנה מעליו ומעל יצחק בנו מהעולם הזה ומהעולם הבא שנ’ וישכם אברהם בבקר ויקח וכו’ וישלחהו בגט גירושין ולקח בגד אחד וקשר במתניה כדי שיהא שוחף אחריה לידע שהיא שפחה ולא עוד אלא שעמד אברהם אבינו לראות את ישמעאל בנו ולראות את הדרך שהלכו בה.

ובזכות אברהם לא חסרו המים מן החמת, וכיון שהגיע לפתח המדבר התחילה תועה אחרי ע”ז של בית אביה ומיד חסרו המים מן החמת לפיכך ותשלך את הילד. ובן כ”ז (י”ג כ”ד) שנה היה ישמעאל כשיצא מבית אביו ויצחק בן עשר שנים היה.

ותלך ותתע וכו’, אין ותתע אלא ע”ז דכתיב בה (ירמיה י טו) הבל המה מעשה תעתועים. ועייפה נפשו של ישמעאל בצמא והלך והשליך את עצמו תחת חרולי המדבר להיות חרשן עליו ואמ’ אלהי אברהם אבי יש לפניך תוצאות מים קח את נפשי ממני ואל אמות בצמא ויעתר לו שנ’ כי שמע אלהים את קול הנער באשר הוא שם ושם נפתחו להם הבאר שנבראת בין השמשות והלכו ושתו ומלאו את החמת מים שנ’ ויפתח אלהים את עיניה ושם הניחו הבאר ומשם נשאו את רגליהם והלכו אל המדבר כלו עד שהגיעו למדבר פארן ומצאו שם מוצאי מים וישבו שם שנ’ וישב במדבר פארן שלח ישמעאל ולקח לו אשה מבנות מואב ועישה שמה. לאחר שלש שנים הלך אברהם לראות את ישמעאל בנו, ונשבע לשרה שלא ירד מעל הגמל במקום שישמעאל שרוי תמן, והגיע לשם בחצי היום ומצא שם את אשתו של ישמעאל. אמ’ לה, היכן הוא ישמעאל. אמרה לו, הלך הוא ואמו להביא פירות ותמרים מן המדבר. אמ’ לה, תני לי מעט לחם ומים כי עייפה נפשי מדרך המדבר. אמרה לו, אין לי לחם ולא מים. אמ’ לה, כשיבא ישמעאל הגידי לו את הדברים הללו ואמרי לו זקן אחד מארץ כנען בא לראותך ואמר חלף מפתן ביתך שאינה טובה לך. וכשבא ישמעאל מן המדבר הגידה לו את הדברים הללו, ובן חכם כחצי חכם, והבין ישמעאל ושלחה אמו ולקחה לו אשה מבית אביה, ופטימה שמה.

ועוד אחר שלש שנים הלך אברהם לראות את ישמעאל בנו ונשבע לשרה כפעם ראשונה שאינו יורד מן הגמל במקום שישמעאל שרוי שם והגיע לשם בחצי היום ומצא שם אשתו של ישמעאל ואמ’ לה היכן הוא ישמעאל אמרה לו הוא ואמו הלכו לרעות את הגמלים במדבר אמ’ לה תני לי מעט לחם ומים כי עייפה נפשי מדרך המדבר והוציאה לחם ומים ונתנה לו עמד אברהם והיה מתפלל לפני הב”ה על בנו ונתמלא ביתו של ישמעאל מכל טוב ממין הברכות וכשבא ישמעאל הגידה לו את הדבר וידע ישמעאל שעד עכשו רחמי אביו עליו כרחם אב על בנים.

לאחר מיתתה של שרה חזר אברהם ולקח את גרושתו שנ’ ויוסף אברהם ויקח אשה ומדקאמר ויוסף משמע שפעם ראשונה היתה אשתו ועוד לא הוסיף לבא עליה ושמה קטורה שהיתה מקוטרת מכל מיני בשמים. ד”א, קטורה — שהיו נאים מעשיה כקטרת. ילדה לו ששה בנים וכלם נקראו על שמו של ישמעאל, שנ’ ותלד לו את זמרן ואת יקשן.

וכאשה שהיא מתגרשת מן בעלה, כך עמד אברהם ושלחן מעל יצחק בנו מן העה”ז ומן העה”ב, שנ’ ולבני הפלגשים אשר לאברהם וכו’ וישלחם בגט גירושין.

פרקי דרבי אליעזר ל׳:ו׳
Perkei D’Rav Eliezer in English
THE TRIALS OF ABRAHAM (continued)
THE ninth trial (was as follows): Ishmael was born with (the prophecy of the) bow, and he grew up with the bow, as it is said, “And God was with the lad, and he grew … and he became an archer” (Gen. 21:20). He took bow and arrows and began to shoot at the birds. He saw Isaac sitting by himself, and he shot an arrow at him to slay him. Sarah saw (this), and told Abraham. She said to him: Thus and thus has Ishmael done to Isaac, but (now) arise and write (a will in favour) of Isaac, (giving him) all that the Holy One has sworn to give || to thee and to thy seed. The son of this handmaid shall not inherit with my son, with Isaac, as it is said, “And she said unto Abraham, Cast out this bondwoman and her son” (Gen. 21:10).
Ben Tema said: Sarah said to Abraham, Write a bill of divorce, and send away this handmaid and her son from me and from Isaac my son, in this world and from the world to come. More than all the misfortunes which overtook Abraham, this matter was exceedingly evil in his eyes, as it is said, “And the thing was very grievous in Abraham’s sight on account of his son” (Gen. 21:11).
Rabbi Jehudah said: In that night the Holy One, blessed be He, was revealed unto him. He said to him: Abraham ! Dost thou not know that Sarah was appointed to thee for a wife from her mother’s womb? She is thy companion, and the wife of thy covenant; Sarah is not called thy handmaid, but thy wife; neither is Hagar called thy wife, but thy handmaid; and all that Sarah has spoken she has uttered truthfully. Let it not be grievous in thine eyes, as it is said, “And God said unto Abraham, Let it not be grievous in thy sight” (Gen. 21:12).

Abraham rose up early, and wrote a bill of divorce, and gave it to Hagar, and he sent her and her son away from himself, and from Isaac his son, from this world and from the world to come, as it is said, “And Abraham rose up early in the morning, and took bread and a bottle of water” (Gen. 21:14). He sent her away || with a bill of divorcement, and he took the veil, and he bound it around her waist, so that it should drag behind her to disclose (the fact) that she was a bondwoman. Not only this, but also because Abraham desired to see Ishmael, his son, and to see the way whereon they went.
By the merit of our father Abraham the water did not fail in the bottle, but when she reached the entrance to the wilderness, she began to go astray after the idolatry of her father’s house; and forthwith the water in the bottle was spent, as it is said, “And she departed and wandered” (ibid.), Ishmael was twenty seven years old (when) he went forth from the house of Abraham, and Isaac was forty years old. By the merit of our father Abraham the water did not fail in the bottle, but when she reached the entrance to the wilderness, she began to go astray after the idolatry of her father’s house; the water in the bottle was spent, and the soul of Ishmael was faint with thirst.

“And she departed and wandered” (ibid.). The meaning of “and she wandered” is merely idolatry, because it is written, concerning (this root), “They are vanity, a work of delusion” (Jer. 10:15). He went and cast himself beneath the thorns of the wilderness, so that the moisture might be upon him, and he said: O God of my father Abraham ! Thine are the issues of death; take away from me my soul, for I would not die of thirst. And He was entreated of him, as it is said, “For God hath heard the || voice of the lad where he is” (Gen. 21:17). The well which was created at twilight was opened for them there, and they went and drank and filled the bottle with water, as it is said, “And God opened her eyes, and she saw a well of water” (Gen. 21:19). And there they left the well, and thence they started on their way, and went through all the wilderness until they came to the wilderness of Paran, and they found there streams of water, and they dwelt there, as it is said, “And he dwelt in the wilderness of Paran” (Gen. 21:21). Ishmael sent for a wife from among the daughters of Moab, and ‘Ayeshah was her name. After three years Abraham went to see Ishmael his son, having sworn to Sarah that he would not descend from the camel in the place where Ishmael dwelt. He arrived there at midday and found there the wife of Ishmael. He said to her: Where is Ishmael? She said to him: He has gone with his mother to fetch the fruit of the palms from the wilderness. He said to her: Give me a little bread and a little water, for my soul is faint after the journey in the desert. She said to him: I have neither bread nor water. He said to her: When Ishmael comes (home) tell him this || story, and say to him: A certain old man came from the land of Canaan to see thee, and he said, Exchange the threshold of thy house, for it is not good for thee. When Ishmael came (home) his wife told him the story. A son of a wise man is like half a wise man. Ishmael understood. His mother sent and took for him a wife from her father’s house, and her name was Fatimah.

Again after three years Abraham went to see his son Ishmael, having sworn to Sarah as on the first occasion that he would not descend from the camel in the place where Ishmael dwelt. He came there at midday, and found there Ishmael’s wife. He said to her: Where is Ishmael? She replied to him: He has gone with his mother to feed the camels in the desert. He said to her: Give me a little bread and water, for my soul is faint after the journey of the desert. She fetched it and gave it to him. Abraham arose and prayed before the Holy One, blessed be He, for his son, and (thereupon) Ishmael’s house was filled with all good things of the various blessings. When Ishmael came (home) his wife told him what had happened, and Ishmael knew that his father’s love was still extended to him, as it is said, || “Like as a father pitieth his sons” (Ps. 103:13). After the death of Sarah, Abraham again took (Hagar) his divorced (wife), as it is said, “And Abraham again took a wife, and her name was Keturah” (Gen. 25:1). Why does it say “And he again”? Because on the first occasion she was his wife, and he again betook himself to her. Her name was Keturah, because she was perfumed with all kinds of scents.
Another explanation of Keturah (is): because her actions were beautiful like incense, and she bare him six sons, and they were all called according to the name of Ishmael, as it is said, “And she bare him Zimran (Gen. 25:2).

Like a woman sent away from her husband, so likewise Abraham arose and sent them away from Isaac his son, from this world and from the world to come, as it is said, “But unto the sons of the concubines, which Abraham had, Abraham gave gifts, and he sent them away from Isaac his son” (Gen. 25:6), by a deed of divorcement.
Corresponding to the name of Ishmael’s son Kedar, the sons of Kedar were so called, as it is said, “Of Kedar, and of the kingdoms of Hazor” (Jer. 49:28). Corresponding to the name of Ishmael’s son “Kedemah” (Gen. 25:15), the “sons of Ḳedem” were so called. Because they dwelt in the territory belonging to Cain, his children were called “sons of Cain,” as it is said, “Now Heber the Kenite had separated himself from Cain” (Judg. 4:11). Were not all the sons of Cain cut off by the waters of the Flood? But because they dwelt in the territory of the children of Cain, his children were called “sons of Cain,” as it is said, “Nevertheless || Cain shall be wasted, as long as Asshur shall dwell in thy place” (Num. 24:22). “Nevertheless Cain shall be wasted away” by fire, through the seed of Ishmael, the latter shall cause the kingdom of Assyria to cease.
Balaam said: Of the seventy nations that the Holy One, blessed be He, created in His world, He did not put His name on any one of them except on Israel; and since the Holy One, blessed be He, made the name of Ishmael similar to the name of Israel, woe to him who shall live in his days, as it is said, “Alas, who shall live when God establisheth him?” (Num. 24:23).
Rabbi Ishmael said: In the future the children of Ishmael will do fifteen things in the land (of Israel) in the latter days, and they are: They will measure the land with ropes; they will change a cemetery into a resting-place for sheep (and) a dunghill; they will measure with them and from them upon the tops of the mountains; falsehood will multiply and truth will be hidden; the statutes will be removed far from Israel; sins will be multiplied in Israel; worm-crimson will be in the wool, and he will cover with insects paper and pen; he will hew down the rock of the kingdom, and they will rebuild the desolated cities and sweep the ways; and they will plant gardens and parks, and fence in the broken walls of the Temple; and they will build a building in the Holy Place; and two brothers will arise over them, princes at the end; and in their days the Branch, the Son of David, will arise, as it is said, || “And in the days of those kings shall the God of heaven set up a kingdom, which shall never be destroyed” (Dan. 2:44).
Rabbi Ishmael also said: Three wars of trouble will the sons of Ishmael in the future wage on the earth in the latter days, as it is said, “For they fled away from the swords” (Isa. 21:15). “Swords” signify only wars, one in the forest of Arabia, as it is said, “From the drawn sword” (ibid.); another on the sea, as it is said, “From the bent bow” (ibid.); and one in the great city which is in Rome, which will be more grievous than the other two, as it is said, “And from the grievousness of the war” (ibid.). From there the Son of David shall flourish and see the destruction of these and these, and thence will He come to the land of Israel, as it is said, “Who is this that cometh from Edom, with crimsoned garments from Bozrah? this that is glorious in his apparel, marching in the greatness of his strength? I that speak in righteousness, mighty to save” (Isa. 63:1).

Chizkuni:
The Chizkuni also picks up on this:
ותקח לו אמו אשה מארץ מצרים ממקום משפחתה וגדוליה. שבתחלה נשא אשה מבנות מואב ולא היתה הגונה ושלח לו אברהם אביו רמזים ע״‎י אותה עצמה שהיתה אשתו, שיגרשנה, כי לא היתה רחמנית והגונה ולקחה לו אמו אשה אחרת רחמנית כדאיתא בפרקי דרבי אליעזר והיינו ותקח לו אמו וגו’.
ותקח לו אמו אשה מארץ מצרים, “His mother took an Egyptian woman to become his wife.” the place where she grew up and where her family still live. Ishmael first married a Moabite woman but she was not a proper wife for him. He divorced her after his father Abraham sent a message to who had been his wife (Hagar) that this woman was bereft of all virtues. Then his mother took a woman from Egypt for his wife. According to Pirkey de Rabbi Eliezer, chapter 30, Yishmael first married a Moabite woman, and when that marriage did not work out, his mother intervened and chose a second wife for him. This is why the Torah had to report that his mother took a wife for him. His Moabite wife had lacked the Abrahamitic virtue of offering hospitality (even to his father).